I want to escape

Sometimes I just want to escape from it all. Hide from my room, go deep into the covers, and let blissful sleep take me, take me until I'm ready to face the world again.

Could one really escape from problems? I wish I could, then instead of hiding here in my room, talking to nobody, wallowing in self-pity, thinking, thinking and thinking till I feel I would probably go insane, I'd probably be out with friends, partying, letting nothing and no one touch me.

I almost did that today. I almost called up my cousin and almost begged her to take me out somewhere, anywhere, where I don't have to face these problems at home. I almost asked someone I barely knew on a date just to get out of this place.

But I didn't. I wanted to, but one thing stopped me, I don't want to do anything I might regret in the future.

Instead I stayed here in my room, hid beneath the covers, and slept, although not so blissfully as I had hoped. Every time I closed my eyes, tears just kept falling beyond my control, and sobs racked my whole body.

As I said, I have the flair for the dramatics, maybe because of watching too much soap opera when I was still in the Philippines. Maybe those series rubbed off on me. Maybe.

Or maybe, this is who I am. I feel too deeply, that's why when I hurt, I hurt with all my heart and mind.

Tomorrow would be another day. It's almost one in the morning here, and still here I am, hiding. I haven't left my room since this morning when my dad and I fought. I couldn't face him yet. I wouldn't know what to say to him anyway.

I wish I could stay in my room forever. Wish I could run away from these things that needed to be faced sooner or later.